Diapers Q&A

question about dads and diaper bags, as well as dads and changing diapers in public restrooms?

Hello, is it stupid to expect my fiance to carry a diaper bag? I was going to get one that is black and not gender specific. Do your husbands/partners etc carry the diaper bag? Also, we are having a girl. If he takes her into the public restroom at the mall or target or whatever is that weird? To anyone that thinks it is, does that mean when i have a boy he should only go in with his dad when he needs a diaper change? please give me your personal experience on this one..i think it is unfare to me, to be the primary diaper changer in public just because I am having a girl

Public Comments

1. I dont think the gender of your baby matters with who changes it. A baby has to be changed, regardless of the gender. I think it is rediculous that men do not have changing areas in public restrooms! That is something to argue over! as far as the diaper bag goes, do what is comfortable for the dad. My husband doesnt mind the one i got for me and my son. No guy is going to look good carrying a bag.
2. When it comes to Babies , Going in any restroom with Mom or dad is fine , there Kids. As far as the Diaper bag goes .. kinda depends on the Guy , My Hubby Will not Carry one , But he keeps everything on hand in the car if needed ! Ask your fiance if he would Carry one , the worst answer you can get is no !
3. no ..thats HIS child hes taking care of...that wud not be weird at all. and if people hav a prob with it ..who cares.. just continue doing wat u r doin. im having a boy n my bf already told me he will be carrying the diaperbag and other stuff liek that..cute huh? i kno he wud have done the same if it was a girl he doesnt care ..good luck hun.. and if any thing people mite just think its cute!
4. No you shouldnt be the primary diaper changer, they sell diaper bags that are not gender specific, or he could even use a backpack if he feels uncomfortable. I am 37wks, and my husband is expecting to be carrying one, he went with me when we got one, so he cant complain that it looks silly. We are having a boy, but when changing a diaper you can go to the "family" restrooms (the ones usually set up for diaper changing, or your husband can go into the male restroom to change diaper. I see it all the time.
5. My husband and I both share a black diaper bag. Nice and unisex. Our son is now 7 months old and we share diaper changes at home and in public. Most malls and stores have family rooms now, so it really isn't a big deal anymore. Just make sure that there's a changing station in both bathrooms if there's no family room.
6. I know they make some "manly" diaper bags. I'd expect my significant other to help just as much in public as in private. I don't think him changing your daughters diaper would be "weird", and if you have a boy, he doesn't have to go with his father. I think people are more used to the Moms doing this stuff, and that's why it's so common to not see that many changing tables in Mens restrooms. It is unfair to you to be the primary diaper changer. I don't think it's weird at all.
7. As long as you don't get the diaper bag w/ the duckies and bunnies on it, it shouldn't be a big deal. We had one from Land's End that looked kind of like a carry-on travel bag. Most public restrooms have changing tables now. I changed my daughters diapers routinely in public restrooms and there was never an issue.
8. I don't think the gender of the baby matters at all, but I do wonder if they even have baby changing tables in the men's bathrooms. If you get a black bag, Dad definitely can carry it. I know that if I was with my husband and my baby, I'd probably carry the bag and he'd carry the baby. When your husband is by himself though, it would be nicer for him to have a masculine looking bag, so black is good.
9. the gender doesn't matter at all. btw, a lot of stores have some unisex or "family" bathrooms for that reason. also, my fiance carries a diper bag, and i have 4 girls. he normally hangs it on the stroller so he doesnt have to carry it. congrads and good luck. xx oh, and im having 2 little boys, and i will change them in the women's restroom. i dont think it matters at all
10. My dh actually asked that I get a more neutral bag so that he doesn't look too girly holding it. I don't think it matters who changes a diaper where or in what restroom as far as the baby's sex is concerned. If you were having a boy there would be times when you will be out alone and need to change his diaper, what are you going to do? Ask some strange man to change it for you? I wouldn't think so. There might be times when your SO is out with the baby alone and will need to change her diaper. Some places now have diaper changing stations in both the mens and womens restroom or a separate "family" restroom where you can change the diaper. You will also most likely at least once find yourself changing your baby's diaper in a odd spot and not have access to a restroom at all.
11. We have a baby girl and our diaper bag is a Vera bradley blue...My husband doesn't mind carrying it when he goes off with the baby. Even when we are together as a family he doesn't mind. He is more proud to be her Daddy than to even think about the macho stuff of looking weird with a diaper bag. Also, a lot of places now have "family restrooms" which means that any parent with any child can use. "mens rooms" dont have the baby changing areas and thats too bad (maybe its a supply and demand thing). fair or not, Moms are usually the promary care givers and are out and about shopping with the children. You would never want your hubby to bring baby into the mens room - even if you were having a boy. You tow will work it out as it goes along. i had never really thought about it much but my hubby and I just kind of work thru it and I never feel like I am the "one in charge" just b/c Im the mom and we have a girl Good Luck!!
12. We have a little girl. My husband said that he wasnt going to change diapers cause she was a girl. Well she came and that changed. He said that he wouldnt change her diaper cause she was a girl, well he did change them. If he doesnt want to change her diaper then that means that you will ALWAYS have to be around or she will marinate in a dirty diaper until you can change it. My husband told me that he wouldnt even change a doodie diaper and he changed them. Is this his first child? If it is, when she comes he will see all what you have to do. My husband told other men that he said that and then when it came to it, he couldnt let her sit there in her "stuff".That sounds like the "macho" approach to diaper changing/diaper bag carrying. ALL of this will change when she comes along. Also I dont think that it is stupid at all for him to take her in a public restroom if he is going to change her. I wondered about that myself when I was pregnant. Plenty of other men do that. I have seen countless dads walking out of the restrooms with their little girls. Where else is he supposed to change her? If he isnt going to carry a diaper bag, what is he going to use if he ever takes her on a daddy/daughter outing, or keeps her for the day. What will he do when mom isnt around? It will change once she gets here. It did for me. He will be put in the position where he will have to end up changing her. This should all change and if it doesnt it is unreasonanble, irresponsible, and immature for a man to REFUSE to change his childs diaper irregardless of the sex. The only responsibilites that are "gender specific" is breast feeding. I feel your frustration, I have been through this before, it should get better. He is just probably nervous of the events to come.
13. Thats part of being a dad take her out to the car if that serious! My hubby does
14. When my husband and I had children, many years ago, we had a girl first and both of us would change her before we went anywhere, and if she needed changing while we were gone, it didn't matter to either of us who changed her! Then we had a boy, and the same outcome.